• Kate Neilson

Being a privileged sad bitch

Sometimes feeling sad isn't just black and white. You come home from work and nothing terrible really happened but for some reason you just want to fling yourself towards the nearest human (housemate, postman, neighbour's hot couch-surfing guest) and have them hold and squeeze you until the tears run dry.

Some people are hesitant to let themselves feel what could be described as 'irrational sadness', because people tell us that because we have a job, a house, friends and food on the table that we're somehow not entitled to feel sad about the little things. This is absolute bullshit.

There are awful things happening in the world around us every second of every day and they 100% deserve our time, tears, thoughts and attention but it's also extremely important to practice self care and sometimes that means losing your shit into a bowl of Doritos while listening to Adele's Greatest Hits.

It's so important for us acknowledge and appreciate our privilege and work towards shrinking the inadequacies that are ever present in our society because there is a butt load of stuff that needs to change and plenty that we need to get mad about but that shouldn't mean that we aren't allowed to feel and process our own feelings in a way that suits us.

So, if you feel like falling into a blubbering mess because you saw the boy that you like kissing someone else on snapchat then you deserve to do so without judgment because it's all fucking relative, right? And sometimes you just feel like this:

1. I just want to sit in a bath all day without smiling

I said this to a friend recently in an attempt to describe my current mood and she totally agreed that this was a thing.

"Yes, that's exactly how I feel too! Maybe with a glass of wine and some Norah Jones?"

Nailed it.

Maybe someone said something to upset you a few months ago and you just thought about it again today or the person that you like didn’t text you back. All you want to do is soak your skin in some cold, milky water and stare pensively out the window as a drop of water falls from the tap onto your pruney toes.

Unfortunately, as twenty-somethings, our rental package doesn’t usually include a bathtub and if it does it usually has grey-ish/ brown undertones or doubles as a storage unit.

2. I just want to watch Cameron Diaz films all day

I don’t know what it is about Miss Diaz but she has the capabilities to renew our sense of hope and self worth while also destroying any spec of confidence that you had left, all at the same time. It must be her dazzling smile paired with the knowledge that you’re never going to look like her when you’re in your 40’s.

A little dose of Cameron will either perk you right back up or allow you to wallow in self pity in your soft pants on the couch. Start with In her shoes for some reassurance that Cameron can portray a character that is as fucked up as you feel and then finish with Charlie’s Angels, because you deserve to feel like a badass slaya.

3. All I want to eat for dinner is a bowl of mashed potato with nothing on the side.

It’s most likely that you dodge this mood on a daily basis at around 4:30pm when your hungries start kick in (you’re a fool if you don’t love mash potato) but sometimes when you’ve had a really shitty day you just need to give in and mash yourself some steamy goodness, mix in lashings of butter and tablespoons of salt and then just go to town on that bad boy.

You’ll most likely feel like dog shit later that night with a belly full of potato but sometimes the heart just wants what it wants and who are you to deny your own heart of its desires?

4. I just want to hear some bad news about someone that has wronged me.

Maybe it's that girl that pulled your pants down at the year 3 swimming carnival or the guy that slept with your older sister and gave her an STD. We've all got a few people in our lives that we wish semi bad things upon.

Not that they’ve died or anything- gosh- never that! But maybe it would be nice to see a picture that they’ve uploaded on Instagram of their awful dye job or maybe they had to get a filling or became dairy intolerant, just something little like that to put a smile back on your face.

This doesn’t make you a bad person, because this is just internal bitchiness that you enjoying privately, in your own head.

Image: Nikki Farmer

Kate Neilson is a list maker and a booty shaker. She is the creator of Twenty Something Humans and is still figuring out what we wants to be when she grows up.

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